This is what followed in text.  Verbatim.

Me (to Matt):  A rich dude just let his door slam into our van with us in here and the van running.  Didn’t apologize or anything.  People are straight crazy.

Matt: Open ur door and give him a dent!

Me:  Might would except the kids and I have been reading proverbs.  :/  couldn’t even leave him a note.  “don’t correct a fool in his foolishness.”

Matt:  So, what do u call what u just did with that text?  ;)

Me:  Being a contentious woman?

Me:  ;)

Matt:  Lol

The other day we went to Sam’s Club to pick up some dough balls, sauce, and cheese for our awesome frozen pizzas.  While there of course we got their cheapest food combos ever: we love their slices of pizza and soda for right around 2 bucks (which is what Matt and I got) and also love their Nathan’s hot dog combo (giant drink and huge hot dog for a buck 70, no kidding, best deal ever!)  After I had finished off half my pizza Matt told me I should try the hot dog again, it had, after all, been months and months since I’d had a Nathan’s.  I resisted because the one the kids didn’t scarf down was BigMan’s and he chose ketchup.  I only eat mustard on my hot dogs, thankyouverymuch.  But Matt insisted, also known as pestering the mess out of you until you just give up, and I complied.  Expecting to hate the ketchupy wrongness of a hot dog.  Instead I was so taken with its deliciousness, that I started giggling while eating.  Y’all, we don’t make enough of a scene in Sam’s with our whole brood, so I brought more attention to us by eating and laughing.  I’m an idiot.  While Matt was mocking what everyone must be thinking watching us (with things like, “look at the ridiculous amount of people stuffing their faces, that’s what’s wrong with the world today), he also snapped this picture of me saying and laughing, “I was right, even with ketchup on it, huh?”  I ate the rest of it and loved every single bite of that silly underpriced goodness.

Even with ketchup on it.

While the fam was watching the Michael Buble’ Christmas special Matt called me in and asked me if 10 years ago (actually it’s more like 12, but who’s counting?) if I had a choice between Michael Buble’ and Matt Parker who would I choose.  I smiled and said Matt of course!  He asked me why to which I replied, “Because you sing better (he does!) and I looove you!”  I then asked him if 10 years ago (give or take a couple o’ years) he had the choice between me and Kelly Pickler who would he choose.

He replied, “You.  Because you sing better and you haven’t had any ‘surgeries’.”  Thanks, honey.

Along with this caption: Cowgirl meets trashy housewife

But it didn’t stop there.  The discussion continued below:

Matt went on to say, “That’s my kinda lady right there!!!” and “Star Wars tee…paint shorts…cowgirl boots! The Tri-Fecta!!!”

And one of Matt’s best friends Stu said, “yeah that star wars shirt gets mad points, well done pearl, she does have the appearence of a triple threat wife, rock on brother”

And if that weren’t enough my own sister chimed in, “Hmmm, and I just sent my one and only child to your house for a week. I guess she came just in time for homeschooling fashion week, lol. Just make a list of fashion accessories I should have on hand for when she returns.”  And followed that with “I think I need to take the rest of the week off and come for a personal lesson myself.”  Oh my word, y’all!  “Homeschooling fashion week” still has me rolling!

And while my parents were here I was discussing politics with my dad and griping about Obama’s latest underhanded scary move and lamenting the ever-increasing prices of groceries while the kids ran around us screaming.  To which my dad retorted, “If I were you and Matt I wouldn’t worry about going hungry, I’d worry more about going crazy.”

And then because I haven’t used the exercise bike in oh, forever (there was that 4 day stint a few months back, but does that really count?) and TheBaby kept climbing on it and falling we moved it to the yard.  Where it has sat for months.  So, yesterday I asked Matt if there was anything wrong with setting it by the road with a “Free” sign on it.  He laughed and said, “There’s nothing wrong with it, it’s just really funny, you better get a picture.”  And so I did.

And no, I didn’t wear the boots down to the road.

And then, just for good measure, we launched Army men into space and ate patriotic cookies.  And played with those controversial sparklers (because yes, Matt did buy 144 of them the other day).

Sometimes the ridiculousness around here even gets me.  Cowgirl trashy housewife that I am.  ;)

I like Daylight Saving Time (though it grates me to not say Daylight Savings Time with the “S” rightfully in place).

I like sunshine and warmth.

I like healthy children.

I like that my girl prays at bedtime “Thank you, God, for brothers and babies.”

I like lots of bright colors.

Like the new case for my new phone.

I like my new smart phone.

I like that I can post things while in town.

I like that I can take instant pictures and instant video.

I like that I can use the “swipe” feature (it’s my fav).

I like that Matt used the GPS thing while in Dallas nonstop.

I like that we referred to the female talking voice of the GPS as “his girlfriend”.

I like that it took all the pressure off me trying to figure out where we were and where we should’ve been going.

I like that while I’m driving I can use the speech microphone thing to speak my texts and statuses.

I like that Matt does it all the time and it never understands his thick southern accent.  Cracks me up the stuff it thinks he says.

I like that Matt’s solution to this is “Nerd Robot Voice”.