Okay, let’s talk dieting.  Again.  And for the sake of keeping it simple we’ll call it a diet (even though you and I know it’s not really a diet, right?  It’s a whole life change.  That’s why you’re going to succeed this time!!)

Again, let me say, I have tried to lose weight and lamented my floppy arms and second chin for 15 years.  Granted, I didn’t have much to lose.  But the point is, I couldn’t drop those few pounds and I didn’t like how I didn’t fit into my clothes.  I now have moved out of the weight loss part of my diet (I lost about 28 pounds in 3 months from 145ish to 117).  Matt doesn’t want me going on and on about him and his weight loss here, but yes, sometimes he’s had to quit wearing his wedding ring for fear of losing it permanently and he’s down 10 sizes in a few months.  Just sayin’.  :)   My point to all this bragging is to say: you can do this.  Without any special tools or surgeries or gym memberships.  I promise you can feel differently.  About your body.  Inside and out.  You can.

Now that you believe me (and you do believe me, right?) let’s move onto some of the details of this diet.

First of all become familiar with calories.  You should have about 1200 – 1500 calories a day to lose weight and be healthy.  Going with the lesser calories (and I don’t recommend less than 1200 a day) plus exercise will make you lose weight quicker than going with 1500 and no exercise.  It’s up to you.

{Oh, wait.  I should tell you I’m not a nutritionist.  I’m not a doctor.  I’m just a mom of 5 kids who has lost weight.  And tried to do it somewhat healthily.  This works for me.  You’re not me.  See a doc.  ‘K?  Now, back to it.}

Here’s the breakdown of somewhere between 1200 and 1700 calories a day for me:  Coffee, breakfast, snack, lunch, snack/coffee, dinner, snack (otherwise known as 4th meal around here).  So, 3 meals, 3 snacks a day.  Yes, I eat snacks.  So should you.  Meals should be somewhere between 300 and 500 calories apiece.  Snacks should be around 100 apiece.  I don’t have any apps I use.  I don’t have a chart.  I don’t have a site or a list.  If I want a toasty ham and cheese melty sandwich (one of our favs!) I now know that regular off-brand buns from Wal-Mart are about 100 calories per bun.  That’s about 20 calories less than Wal-Mart’s sandwich bread (if I remember correctly).  So, we eat most of our sandwiches now on those buns.  I like mine toasted.  We buy either deli meat or Kentucky Legend ham (I’m not being paid, it’s what we like).  I check how many ounces is how many calories.  We do have this little scale thing. It’s worth the money to know how many ounces of meat you’re eating.  I then measure out the serving size of meat and then the serving size of cheese.  We’ve dropped mayo.  We either use light mayo, light Miracle Whip, or just mustard.  I like spicy mustard.  Then we slice up a tomato and some lettuce (use as much of these as you want – they’re free calories and good fillers!)  Yes, this is a complete meal.  Eat this, drink some water, and go hungry until your next snack.  Which should be in an hour or two.  This leads nicely into the make-friends-with-hunger, it-won’t-kill-you section.

Start Boldly (AKA Free Yourself!)

During the “get where you want” phase of the diet you’re going to be hungry.  A lot.  It’s okay.  It will get you where you want to be.  Know that this really strict phase is just that.  It’s a phase.  A boot camp.  It’s a learning time.  You’re breaking habits, praying a lot, and learning during this period.  Eat a meal (like the sandwich above) and leave the table hungry.  If you’re still “I’m going to hurt someone, my stomach is touching my backbone” level of hungry after about 30 minutes then snack on something else.  A banana, an apple, a peach, a serving size of mini carrots and skip the ranch dressing for now.  Then step away still hungry.  You’ll discover after you’ve done this a few times that most of the time your hunger subsides after about half an hour.  You’ve just been eating right past this point and not knowing it before.  You’re going to become familiar with it again.  You’re learning.  Be patient with yourself.  It was during this phase when I almost had a mental breakdown while feeding the Baby hot fudge.  But I knew I needed to break old habits, become a new person, and then ease back into a normal life of eating normal things.  I once read somewhere it takes 28 days to form a habit.  I wanted to at least get to that place before easing up.

Also, here’s a hint I figured out which will be slightly (ahem) off color to speak of.  I mentioned before that when my diet changed so did my (ahem) regular (or not so much) habits.  I discovered that really I can’t get enough fruits and veggies and water to keep me (ahem) regular.  So I needed to add a bit more fiber to my diet.  I discovered that you can take the fiber pills, but I’m really not good at taking pills.  And I was taking 5 at a time twice a day.  But the liquid Metamucil type drinkable fiber?  Now, that has benefits for me.  I know it has the artificial sweeteners, but I opt for a double dose of the orange liquid (and I actually like the taste of the Great Value kind better than the name brand) in a huge glass and I chug it.  It fills me up.  So when I’ve had quite a few calories already, I’m kinda hungry but it’s not time for a meal or a snack and I haven’t had any fiber yet for the day I will down one of those glasses.  Let me tell ya, between the amount of water in that glass and the expandable fiber you will feel full when you finish.  I’m tellin’ ya, benefits.  I know, I’m just lettin’ ya know, it’s helpful.  And I only drink one of those mega glasses a day.

Another habit I needed to break was the “well, the kids are in bed, I’m sitting down to watch tv, and now I will eat continuously until I go to bed” habit.  This was really, really hard for me.  I sat very fidgety for a month or 2 during that time.  Don’t get me wrong I still have that 4th meal (bedtime snack), but now I count calories to between 100-150 and stop at that.  I don’t eat the whole time.  And I figure out what has the best bang for my caloric buck.  I’ll get to some of those tips in a minute.

Get Where You Wanna Be (AKA Maintenance Phase)

For me, the breaking of those old habits took a couple of months.  I knew I had arrived when I didn’t spend the whole 2 hours at bedtime doing nothing but thinking of eating.  When I no longer spent so much extra mental power battling the desire to eat.  When I didn’t feel out of control wanting a candy bar.  This will be different for everybody.  I also waited to reintroduce chocolate to my diet when I hit my goal of 120 pounds.  I didn’t make the deal with myself, “Hey, Self, when you reach your weight goal then it’s all over, all bet’s are off, time to celebrate and throw off those shackles!!”  Because you were actually throwing off the shackles by going on this diet.  They’re off when you break the habits!  And you’ve gone so long without sweets and chocolate at this point that some things are too sweet now.  And you certainly don’t want the king-sized candy bar you used to have.  One mini candy bar, now that’s more like it!  You’ll still keep your 1500 calories: 3 meals, 3 snacks a day plan.  Snacks shouldn’t be much more than 100-150 calories apiece.  If you want ice cream you can either eat a smaller portion of regular or you can get the larger portion of diet.  Our favorite right now (though they’re going out of business, so we’ll have to find something else) is Guilt Free by Yarnell’s.  And did you know that you can put 2 scoops on these little cake cones (the cones are only 20 calories!) and get an ice cream cone for 120 calories?  Yes, ma’am, you can.  But I would recommend setting a goal for when you’ll reintroduce some things into your diet.  A fasting of sorts.  Break your habits, get out of your shackles, get some confidence and then ease into indulgent snacking (your new indulgent).  Until then, eat an apple.  Grab a banana.  Prove to yourself that you do indeed have self-control.

Chips (AKA How do you live without them?!)

Okay, look.  I have to have chips.  Even salty non-chocolate chips. We found that the Quaker Quakes Rice Snacks are very reasonable calorie-wise.  We’ve tried the Sea Salt with Black Pepper, the Rosemary and Garlic, and the Ranch.  Here’s the tip with these.  Check the serving size, count them out to your plate, put the bag back in the cabinet and walk away.  Don’t go back for seconds.

Also, my salsa.  I love my salsa.  And it’s good for me.  With really, only good calories.  But it’s the tortilla chips that pack the unwanted punch.  What to do, what to do?  I discovered that these Great Value little round chips give me roughly the same calories as the larger fancier chips, but I can have more of them at a time.  Same amount, I just feel like I’m getting to eat more.  And mind games matter.  So I count out the total number of chips per serving, put them on my plate and walk away from the bag.  Then I use them like a spoon and scoop as much salsa as I can fit onto one of those little chips.  More of the good for me stuff, less of the not so good for me stuff.  This is counter to what I used to do – I would hold 2 or 3 chips together at a time and barely dip it in the salsa.  But I’m eating plenty this way (I was much fuller than I expected doing this and ate less calories – win/win).

Coffee and Cokes (AKA Don’t drink your calories)

Coffee – I refuse to give it up.  At least right now.  But I don’t have to have fancy creamer (which can add a lot of calories), I just use plain powder creamer and sugar.  I also refuse to buy expensive fake sugar right now.  But I did cut my coffee sugar from 3 teaspoons to two.  Not much, but it adds up over time.  When I post those Starbucks pics on Facebook I have a simple regular coffee in there (I like Pike Place) with some creamer and a few sugars.  I don’t get the big syrupy drinks.  I drink about 2 cups a day most days.  Sometimes I up the ante in the afternoon with an iced coffee.  It’s my regular coffee with milk added and ice.  It’s a trade off I’m willing to make.

Cokes – I don’t drink many sodas.  I do miss Root Beer and Sonic’s Cherry Limeades, but I’d rather eat than drink.  So I make my decision.  I did drink a Route 44 Cherry Limeade the other day and it was pure bliss.  But I made the decision to skip something else.  If you’ll remember I hate water.  So I was thrilled when I found these Great Value Naturally Sweetened Drink Mixes (made with Stevia).  I mix one of these little packets with a large mason jar of iced water for a huge drink, without the artificial sweeteners, and total calorie count of 30.  If you must have a coke, have one.  But make a trade somewhere else.  You are in control.  You are not subject to someone else’s rules.  If you make the decisions then you’ll be more likely to stick with this.

Chocolate (AKA Are you really living the rest of your life without it?!)

This goes back to the earlier discussion.  You will eventually eat chocolate again.  Just not in the massive amounts you’ve become accustomed to and not right away.  Take a break, lose the addiction, and then step back to it slowly.  I haven’t eaten any chocolate chips yet, because I don’t trust myself yet.  I have eaten a couple of those mini Twix.  Because I can eat that little thing and be okay.  If you inadvertently put a piece of candy in your mouth because you’ve forgotten (don’t laugh, I’ve done this!) then spit it out.  I’m not kidding.  Turn around and spit it in the trash.  You’ll be proud of yourself, I promise.  Also, eventually you can eat chocolate ice cream (the guilt free kind), Matt discovered you can smoosh ice cream between those Quaker Quakes Rice Cakes (the caramel kind are marvelous this way!)  You will eat chocolate again.  Just in a smart way.

Eating Out (AKA I don’t want to always have to decline social invites.)

I eat out.  I always have.  Matt and I have too many adventure days to not.  But when we buy the easy cheap $5 hot ‘n ready pizzas, we salivate, tremble, tell each other how much we hate them and pass them on back to the kids.  Then we go get a 6 inch Subway Club or Ham sandwich or (our absolute favorite…) Blue Coast Burrito.  We split one larger sized burrito.  Because they offer mostly fresh and whole foods.  The goal is to be healthy and smart.  Sometimes, though we’ve eaten mexican food or other foods.  We just eat way less than normal (get the leftovers to go – by all means, don’t waste ‘em!) And now I will eat a slice of pizza occasionally, but I eat a slice compared to the 3-5 I had before.  I won’t give up social events.  I believe eating together is important.  It’s a special part of our world.  We just need to figure out a way to fit it into our lives, eat fewer snacks later, eat a smaller portion, eat slower, and step away hungry.

You can do this.  I promise.  Do you have tricks and tips you’ve tried for weight loss?  Mind sharin’ ‘em?  I’ll be back next time with our menu plan and a few more recipes and snack ideas.

In the meantime, just start somewhere.  Start small.  Pray beforehand.  You can do this.  Just start somewhere.